What fuels this wheel-spinning is fear and anxiety. We feel
a lack of internal control, like our mind and body are doing this distressing
thing to us. In response, we look for
things outside of us to control, like situations, people, outcomes. It relieves some of our anxiety for the
moment and is, therefore, a protective response. If we can become aware of this response in
the moment, we can then consider the underlying anxiety. It is preferable to
experience our true feelings and take steps to manage those, rather than continue
to try and manage things we do not have control over. It is a paradox in that
the more we attempt to control what is external, the more powerless we become. So,
what DO we have control over? The answer is our internal world and all of the thoughts
and feelings that reside there.
Our thoughts have the power to either increase anxiety or to
lessen it. Being mindful of our thoughts can help make anxiety
more manageable. The three main components of mindfulness are:
§
Notice
§
Be Curious
§
Let it Go
When we stop what we are doing, close our eyes, and turn our
attention inward, thoughts will naturally come and go. The goal is not to stop the brain from
producing thoughts. The goal is to be aware of them by noticing the thoughts in
the moment they come up, be curious without judging them as good/bad or
right/wrong, and then let them go.
The
following visual exercise can help:
See a snow globe in your mind’s eye that has been shaken
up. Notice the tiny flakes all swirling
around inside. Think of the globe as
your mind and the flakes as your thoughts. As you watch the flakes float gently
downward, imagine your thoughts floating around, then notice as they slowly
descend and settle on the bottom of your mind just as the flakes settle at the
bottom of the snow globe.
IMPORTANT TO REMEMBER: No one flake is better than another and, most importantly,
you are not connected emotionally to any of the flakes. It is similar to riding in a car or train and
watching the scenery go by. With mindfulness, you simply watch your thoughts go
by.
If you practice noticing your thoughts in a neutral way, they
will naturally slow down, stop spinning, and prevent your anxiety from
increasing.
May we all create the time and space to connect to our internal
world, gifting ourselves with mindfulness.
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